Theatre Widow

Three to four times a school year, and sometimes 2 - 3 months a summer, I become what is known as a "Theatre Widow".  What is a theatre widow (or widower, but for the sake of this blog, we'll use widow)? A theatre widow is a woman (or man, if it's widower) who is in a significant relationship with a person who is in the theatre business.  "How does just that fact alone widow you?", you ask?  When a show is close to premiering, cast, crew and production staff go into what is called "Tech Week(s)".  This is where they hammer out all the final details of the performance: any changes to stage blocking, the lights are hung and focused, set pieces are completed (some are drying as the opening curtain rises), sound cues are checked and rehearsals go into overtime as everyone works to make sure all the components work together well.  This takes hours.  Theatre is not a 9 - 5 gig.  So, during those time of tech hell, my husband is virtually invisible.  We'll see him in the morning as we're getting ready and that's the last time the kids will see him before the following morning.  I'm lucky if I see him before I go to bed!  He's not here = I'm theatre widowed.  As my background is also in theatre, I have experienced all facets of production and tech as well, so I know what to expect and what's going on, but it certainly doesn't make me miss him any less.

Currently, I am theatre widowed.  And I'm going back to work, which means the baby has started day care.  And (FINALLY) our son starts back to school on Monday, but I had to have someone watch him this week, so I had to take him there too.  This mama has been busting her hump this week (and I will most of next week too), single-handedly, and all the stuff that needs to get done, mostly got done (finding our son's lost shin guard did not happen, much to husband's chagrin).  Kids were fed, clothed, bathed, and entertained; dishes got done; and even some laundry made it through the washer AND dryer.  However, the house is in somewhat of a disarray.  I have never claimed to be the best Susie Homemaker, even when husband is home!  I feel for the mamas who are single all the time.  These times make me grateful for all the times I'm not widowed, but they also remind and empower me that I can do it.  I may not be the perfect theatre widow/single mom, but I do the best I can, all in the name of entertainment.

So, next time you go to see a show: high school (don't forget all those teachers who take time away from their families to work with those kids!), college, community, regional, professional, whatever, think about those who have worked tirelessly to entertain you, and their families who have not seen them for any significant amount of time.  Yes, it's a life choice, but so is any career.  And my husband loves it.  I get bragging rights: "Yes, my husband designed the show!  I'm so glad you enjoyed it!"  Enjoy the show!